Inspiration

I don’t know what actually inspires me to write. Sometimes I just feel the urge to put something down. I never actually think about it so I just write. I want to put down everything that happened in my day. Whatever made me emotional or what caught my interests is the things I want to write about. It doesn’t matter if it is insignificant; I still want to document the experience on paper just like I do with art. Speaking of art, I haven’t drawn for days. I feel guilty about that because in a couple of weeks my AP art portfolio is due. I don’t know if I am going to procrastinate and finish it all in one day, but I need to do something about it. I noticed that I have little motivation to draw or keep up with my studies lately. All I have been doing is occasionally scrolling in Quora, commenting, and writing here and there. Writing has been sort of an addiction for me. It serves as a temporary retreat so I can avoid my current problems and situation.It is sort of relaxing for me like art. However, with art, I have been pressured to draw to keep up with the demands of my art class. I like writing when I am not being forced to do it for academic purposes. I don’t like it when I have to write a paper about some mundane topic for English. It is funny how at this moment I am actually procrastinating for English. The topic that I chose is so boring and requires a lot of extensive research and explanation. I basically dug a hole for myself and now I have to climb out of it. The paper isn’t due till Sunday, but I have little time to think about not doing it. It is also a major grade and our last major grade so I actually have to put some little effort. Sometimes I wish I was one of those people who can whip out a good essay in a matter of an hour and still get a decent grade out of it. This year in English I have been struggling with the teacher and can’t do something right for one time. She doesn’t appreciate the way I write so, therefore, it is alway a constant struggle for me to get the grade I want and to please her nitpicky ways. The year is dwindling down fast and summer is approaching. Like many other students, I need inspiration to keep on going strong. Lately, I don’t seem to have it with anything. I just want to be done and graduate. But I still have another year before that even happens! Despite having all the credits necessary for graduation, I still have to stick around and suffer for another year. Yay me! I can’t wait to be a senior. The effects of senioritis have already gotten to me and it is slowly killing my motivation to do actual shit for my classes. I can’t wait for college. I definitely can’t wait for summer as well!